The Booty Pop Variations

By Kenneth FitzGerald

One of the below-the-fold front page stories of the July 22 Wall Street Journal told the tale of the increasing popularity of the Booty Pop. For some reason, this information was passed along to my two kids before departing on a drive from Brooklyn to Massachusetts. Along the way, the game became creating rhyming variations on the fashion accessory, with Emma assiduously (intended) documenting them all. Snacks featured prominently. Here they are:

1. Booty Pop-corn (Booty JiffyPop).
Just put your butt to the fire and enjoy a tasty treat.

2. Booty Pop
With a soda dispenser.

3. Booty Popsickle.
Self-explanatory.

4. Booty Plop
Spring action bounces you back upright should you fall on your keister.

5. Booty Stop
Sci-fi force-field projector included.

6. Booty Mop
Cleaning aid.

7. Booty Prop
Comes with extendable propellers for breeze generation or low-level flight.

8. Booty Hop
Another spring-loaded affair.

9. Booty Slop
Even pig farmers need to increase their assets.

10. Booty Crop
Plant on the slopes of Mt. Heinie and harvest your bounty.

11. Booty Bop
Makes your ass rock sonically.

12. Booty Cop
Comes with siren and flashing lights.

13. Booty Chop
You thought Slap Chop was great?

14. Booty Cyclop.
Has only one cheek.

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